Should be Doing Homework

But instead I'm blogging. Oh well, one quick one and then I do homework. Sounds fair enough, yes?

I went to KC last Friday in a rental car - a 2007 Aveo. It moved well enough - a little too well, but was a very generic car. It didn't even have power locks or windows! Anyway, this post isn't about the car (last time I drove a PT Cruiser) it's about the trip. I got a speeding ticket. For 80 in a 55. Yeah, that's a $207 ticket. Had it been a foot race I'd have won, because the cop was a really big boy. I called my boss at work who told me that when he was a cop 20 mph over the speed limit was an automatic visit to jail. I told him to think about giving me a raise, and he told me he'd think of baking me a cake with a file in it.

I've never had a moving violation! Not since I was 16 and got a speeding ticket for 31 in a 20mph zone. But I was a juvie so it doesn't count. I've been pulled over for every violation imaginable though but never ticketed. I was even pulled over when I was 17 by a cop who wanted my number. Honestly? It was intentional once in awhile because I had a huge crush on a cop that always let me go when he pulled me over. We'll call him Officer W. If I saw him cruising, I'd speed up/slow down/swerve/etc., he'd stop me, talk to me, lecture me, chastise me, then let me go. To do it again. Yeah, I'm pretty sure he knew what I was doing. Truth be told I'd probably still be doing it if I ever saw him out driving.

Anyway, the speeding ticket. It's not a mandatory appearance, and I'm tempted to contest it (not because I'd win but because I could say that I've never had a ticket and wanted to see what it's like) but I know full well that this large cop in little podunk Kansas would definitely show up for the hearing - for bragging rights; "yeah boys, I nailed a babe doing 25 over..." Because you know Podunk doesn't get many delinquents.. And he wouldn't bother to clarify the semantics of the word "nailed".

Why am I not more upset about the cops of our state ruining the driving experience? Because I like cops. That way. It's sort of a fetish I guess. You can't imagine how many trips to jail it took me to find Officer W. I really was a juvenile criminal. A lot of cops warn you and let you off when you're young and female; but there are the few that won't. I'm sure they're gay. Not that there's anything at all wrong with gay men in police uniforms, they are super fun to look at, it's just that they do me no good. I adore gay men. They're usually the best looking men out there, aside from the obvious femininity.

But I'm getting off topic again. Police. I'm a lot more careful now seeing as I'm of age (which makes me legal, guys) and more likely to actually go to jail and have it stick. ...What? That wasn't the topic?


Toadie and I had another yelling match on Thursday. I figure I upset the Powers that Be by unloading on Toadie Wednesday so I was sent to the segregation of detailing bathrooms on the first floor. It sounds worse than it was. Well not really, but it's really not that bad if you don't actually do anything. I broke out my headphones and blared some Nickelback into my ears. We're not supposed to listen to music while working but the reasoning is that we have direct contact with patients. Well, when you're detailing first floor bathrooms you're not going to run into any patients, just losers you work with. I was hurting nothing. She was livid though. Screamed at me to "lose the ear phones!" when I said no that "you guys segregated me and I'm not wandering around here in silence talking to myself" she snapped back telling me to "clear it with Jm first"... Well, Jm already knew - I had gone to his office to tell him I was heading to the gift shop for batteries. He knew full well and just didn't care. I told her so. She sighed dramatically, said something like "oh for pete's sake" and stormed out. She, along with everyone else, thinks I'm Jm's favorite. Well I should be. The rest of these people are losers.

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