I've read some quotes that are kind of spiffy. So here, I share with you:

Women might be able to fake orgasms, but men can fake a whole relationship. You shouldn't compare yourself to others they are more screwed up than you think. Fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity. At least I have a positive attitude about my destructive habits. A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm. Love is like a rose in winter, only the strong survive. The only reason that I talk to myself is because that I'm the only one whose answers I accept. The two most common elements in the world are hydrogen and stupidity. No guy is worth your tears & the ones who are won’t make you cry. Suicide is a way of telling God, You can’t fire me I quit! Don’t waste your time on a guy that isn’t willing to waste his time on you. Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway. A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out. Nothing improves the memory more than trying to forget. Never look back unless you’re planning to go that way. Never eat in an ethnic restaurant in which no people of that ethnicity are eating. Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it’s better to leave them broken than try to hurt yourself putting it back together. A woman either loves or hates; she knows no medium. I have great faith in fools; self-confidence my friends call it. Nobody really cares if you’re miserable, so you might as well be happy. Every human being is the author of his own health or disease. A human can be healthy without killing animals for food. Therefore if he eats meat he participates in taking animal life merely for the sake of his appetite. Patience is not a virtue, it is a waste of time. Never explain yourself. Your friends don’t need it and your enemies won’t believe it. Men are like a box of chocolates...You never know which one has nuts. Never forget what a man says to you when he is angry.

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