2.20.2008

And I Have Proof!

Everyone says to me "no way can that sweet little dog be anything less than innocent!" Uh - huh. Oh yes. He can. As I type, I can hear him in the livingroom tearing something apart. I've been out there a dozen times and taken whatever he had away from him, but he still finds something else. This is not a picture of a "Good Dog". No, this is a picture of the mounted head that I turned his obnoxious little stubby ass into.

I had a package of feminine hygiene products on a bookcase in my diningroom (it's where everything goes when I first bring it home) and somehow the little shit got ahold of it. Well, he tore the bag open, and pads were strewn throughout my house. I picked up all I could find and still, on occasion, I find a pad, shredded, laying on my floor. I don't know where he's keeping them.

Since he was brought home to me, this little beast has:
  • done his business on my floor repeatedly..
  • Oh! And in my car as well!
  • chewed up three pairs of my jeans, and
  • two comforters that "accidentally" hung a little too far off my bed (I suspect that Dingo had something to do with that)
  • chewed holes in my futon cushion
  • chewed up at least one pair of shoes (I'm pretty sure there's more, as I can't seem to find a couple pairs)
  • tore the stuffing and squeaker out of half a dozen Dingo toys
  • chewed up a DVD case from Hollywood Video, and
  • a library book, and
  • my phone cord
  • bit me (too many times to count) and left little puppy-teeth marks
  • (I heard him chewing on something just now as I'm writing this) he chewed on a bra. Yeah, just now.
  • bit my Mom - and drew blood
  • I go on a shoe hunt several times a day since he drags my shoes away.

  • I could go on and on.. And on. But I think you get the point. I find myself frequently apologizing to Dingo for bringing a savage into our house. I actually have to go to class this week and tell my teacher "my dog peed on my homework".

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