I go to school orientation this Friday, and I'm going to run into a bitch. This bitch (who I'm hereby dubbing Buttaball), was a pretty close friend of mine during my last school stint and it ended badly with her dumb ass remarrying her ex-husband that fucked her former best friend (RolyPoly). This big, dumb, inverted penis'ed idiot hates me, presumably (her words) because I'm the pretty, single, man-magnet friend (as I said, her words.. I'd have said, "beautiful, available, man-eating" -- and these days I'd add "black widow" just because I'm running through men like water down the drain.) Oh, and the "inverted penis" part? Yeah, she told me that.. and RolyPoly works with my current best friend, and she verified his penis-less-ness. I couldn't make this shit up, even if I tried, and you better know my imagination rocks.
Now originally, when I found out his penis was inverted, I felt sorry for my friend because really, who wants a man without a penis? And then, after I learned the friend-fuck-hubby story, I felt sorry for the friend. RolyPoly not only lost her friend, but she did so for a lay that couldn't possibly have been, well, gratifying.
Now, though, I feel sorry for neither of them, because they're both stupid.
So I get to see Buttaball this Friday, and on one hand I'm looking forward to it because it'll make her uncomfortable. On the other hand, it'll make me uncomfortable, too. I don't know if I should ignore her and pretend she doesn't exist, or say 'hello' and then pretend she doesn't exist, or make it a point to act as if she's a mere insect beneath a microscope. Either way, I'll have a story to tell ya come Friday night. Stay tuned..